I've been asking myself this question for, oh I don't know, the last 10 years.
30 has, literally, just come around the corner, and I still don't have the answer.
When I was in high school, I thought I knew.
I was going to be an accountant - I know, WTF?
I was pretty good at Accounting and Economics (there's a trophy at my old high school that says so) so it kinda made sense.
I was going to Auckland Uni to get my Bachelor of Commerce degree. I was going to Major in Financial Accounting or Taxation, maybe a double major with Commercial Law.
I would become Nellie Lesa, Chartered Accountant extraordinaire.
Into my third year, accounting and numbers were the last things I wanted to do with the rest of my life. When I did eventually graduate, I still had no idea what I wanted to do with my life.
But I knew this: I didn't want to be an accountant.
I've tried thinking of what my passions are today...and how they could translate into a bill-paying career.
I love music. Let me rephrase that, I love listening to music. I have no musical talent whatsoever. I like to think I can sing. I sound amazing when I sing along to my ipod. In my room. With the door closed. And nobody's home. And then I did what everyone does...I recorded it. Big mistake. Dreams of superstardom were shattered. Sadly, a music career is not in the cards. But there must be something, some way this could be my career...right? I have no idea.
I like sci-fi/fantasy type tv shows/movies/books/THINGS...and I might possibly have a small collection of said THINGS. I even go to conventions. How that can translate into a job that pays actual money? I have no idea.
I have a ridiculous obsession for rugby league. I run my own and join multiple tipping comps and fantasy leagues. I post on the message boards and forums - yes, I am one of those people - and I even post comments on newspaper articles. How can this translate into a viable career? I have no idea.
That pretty much sums up my life plan: I have no idea.
There was a time when I thought becoming a librarian was what I wanted, no needed, to be. They have BOOKS; they have a music collection; and sci-fi books/movies/tv shows/EVERYTHING! They even have rugby league books/dvds! Becoming a librarian would solve all my problems.
Did you know you need a degree to become a proper, registered librarian? Did you know that librarians have to be registered?
I didn't either!
Going back to Uni as a 30 y.o isn't appealing in the slightest. And what if I got the degree, and discovered this isn't what I want to do with the rest of my life? I'd have another degree to add to the degree I already have and don't use.
And yet, working in a library, being surrounded by books all day, sounds so appealing *sigh*
What I failed to take into account was that this would be my job and there are people who use the library. And that being a librarian isn't (sadly) sitting around reading books all day *sadface*
And that you are in a customer service based role.
I don't like customers. I deal with customers in the job I have now, and I can barely stand talking to them on the phone and replying to their e-mails. Librarians deal with customers face to face! The horror!
I am not cut out to be a librarian. Woe is me.
So it's back to square one...again.
I'm 30 years old. I have an accounting degree that I have no intention of using. And I still have no idea what to do with my life.
For now, I'm happy to work in a job that, while it doesn't fulfill any of my passions, it pays the bills on the time, and helps me to indulge my passions.
Sure, I'm not earning mega bucks - more like teeny, tiny bucks - but money isn't everything right?